Diwali is a time of togetherness. But if you’re unable to be with your family or friends during this time, the same can be particularly challenging to deal with. This can either be for work or studies, and living far away from home.
“When people want to spend time with their loved ones, the inability to do so can have a major impact on them. During the festive season, mental health concerns are at their highest,” says Dr Minakshi Manchanda, associate director of psychiatry at Asian Hospital in Faridabad. However, no one can stop you from finding ways to be happy. Here are a few ways to light up your Diwali.
Deck up your place
What makes Diwali a sight to behold? Decorations. Begin by decorating your home with oil lamps or diyas. If you are creative enough, try to make a rangoli. Colourful curtains, drapes, and tapestries are other easy ways to liven up your room. If you love bright objects, fairy lights are your friend. Sushma Chakraborty (name changed) works with a digital media news company in Delhi and will not be able to visit home this Diwali due to work commitments. She feels bad as this is the time when she should be prioritising family. However, she doesn’t let that dampen her festive fervour. “I put up lots of fairy lights and diyas in my room to feel festive while working,” adds the 25-year-old native of Bardhaman in West Bengal.
Connect with others
Diwali doesn’t have to be a lonely affair, you can visit your friends, relatives or invite them over to spend time together. “I have relatives in the city, so I can either go to their place and celebrate with them or just be at home and do nothing. Also, because my maid will take an off day because it’s festival time for her too, I might just order food from outside,” says 24-year-old IT professional Sana Singh, who lives in Mumbai but hails from Lucknow in Uttar Pradesh.
Shreyas Sharma, a 45-year-old medical professional based in Noida, will be on duty during Diwali and will take a few days off later in the year to be with his wife and son, who will come over from their native place in Assam. On Diwali, he plans to visit his cousin brother’s family in Delhi’s Vasant Kunj area and be a part of their celebrations. “I’ll have good food and conversations with them; basically, eat, drink, and be merry,” he quips. Similarly, Akanksha Raj, a 30-year-old HR professional living in Delhi’s Mayur Vihar area, says she loves to play cards and would invite her friends over for a fun time on Diwali.
Be a part of community
Every residents’ welfare association or housing society in cities as well as towns organises community initiatives during Diwali. Your housing complex is already lit up and looking pretty; community dinners or interactions with new people will only add to the festive spirit.
A Sashastra Seema Bal jawan posted along the border with Nepal says not being able to be with their families during the festive season is part and parcel of their job. “Our duty is to man the border at all times of the year. Anti-national elements will not compromise on their activities just because it’s a holiday or festival. This year, I do not see myself celebrating Diwali with my family,” he says, adding: “While I do miss out on not being able to be with them during this time, I consider the forces as one big family and celebrate all festivals with them in equal measure.”
Don’t feel left out
The first and foremost advice that mental health professionals give in this ever-connected world of social media is to avoid overdoing it to deal with FOMO. “Excessive social media use, in my opinion, is harmful. Facebook and Instagram are filled with posts about everyone having a great day with family and friends. Perhaps there are images of people mingling with people and attending parties that may make you feel left out,” says Dr Manchanda of Asian Hospital.
If you are battling grief and trauma of losing a loved one, Dr Aarushi Dewan, consultant psychologist at Aakash Healthcare in Delhi, says exposure to other people’s celebrations may trigger difficult emotions or past memories and exacerbate grief. Her advice is to limit exposure to social media, focus on the activities that promote relaxation such as practising self-care activities that elicit happy emotions. “For instance, you can collate all the memories that you have had with your loved ones from the past festive seasons, and put them down on a scrapbook. This will help you to remember the deceased family member in a positive way, instead of mourning over the loss,” says Dewan.
