Catholicism took 17 centuries to grant liberty of expression that enabled science, invention, art and literature to flourish. An American president took just over four years into his presidency to set a precedent by endorsing homosexual marriage. That?s bubbled up wide-ranging negative-positive views across the world. Being black, did Barack Obama empathise better with discrimination that non-mainstream people are subjected to? Such prejudiced experience could be on account of race, colour, caste, gender, same-sex marriage among others.
Pede comme un phoque (French slang ?gay like a seal?) is how my colleagues had cautioned me when I was assigned to assist Maitre Arte, Russian-born French Art Deco artist, to clean scratches in his lithographic prints on paper in a closed room. That was my first brush with the concept of homosexuality. As a 20-year-old sweeper in a lithography paint shop near Paris in 1974, I didn?t understand their warning as I still couldn?t speak French. I deeply revered this first art master I?d met, a gracious, creative and humble person who treated me as an equal artist, saying, ?Art is a silent giant that stays, it?s never obsolete.? Arte trained me that, ?Art does not sell by itself. It?s not like physics or chemistry with self reaction to move. As an artist you have to make art go places.?
After he?d migrated to the US and become a famous designer in many fields including fashion, jewellery, graphic arts, costume and set design for theatre, film, opera and interior d?cor, I came to know he was a homosexual. Because the first homosexual I?d ever met was Arte, whose talent, passion and love for human beings is etched in my memory, I?ve become a supporter of the gay community.
Jean Francois Trouve, a most talented business principal in my Paris office who?d worked 10 years with me, makes no bones about his being gay. I?ll never forget his elegance, extravagant knowledge, perceptive behaviour. He loves to drive my Mercedes, and being of short stature, pulls the seat up front. But when he returns the car, he?s never failed to leave the seat exactly the way he found it. I?ve met his boyfriend Bertrand several times, they are living together for over 25 years now. This exceptional couple?s intellectual connect with me is unparalleled. The 1980s AIDS propaganda in Europe was that all homosexuals are in trouble. I was very scared for them, but Jean Francois explained, ?AIDS has obliged gays to re-invent a new sexuality, more sensual, more based on sharing moments. The fear of the damaged condom is always present in our mind. AIDS actually reinforced links in gay couples, there?s more fidelity now, less sexual partners! Sexuality will always be important for us, but in a bit different way.? While writing this article I gave Jean Francois a call and found him in his country house. Bertrand and he had taken his father for a vacation there.
Jean Francois introduced me to the famous gay caf? in Le Marais District, Paris? legendary gay quarter. It?s a place to get drugged with creativity. Nothing can replace for me this most fashionable district of incredible creativity because I?m forever looking out for new ideas for corporate work or my own paintings. Alone one day in this gay caf?, I was concentrating on some writing when a little drama unfolded. I may have been the only non-gay person at the caf? so I tried not to give any false impression. Seated at the next table was a gay couple, one dressed in a manly fashion reading a newspaper, while his partner with female mannerisms was holding his hand, looking up to his face lovingly. But the newspaper reader paid scant attention. Upset or perhaps bored by this lack of response, the partner?s eyes strayed to a nearby table. The man there returned an expressive face, making inviting eyes. It was an amazing experience watching this fabulous romantic adventure in such an open space. Contact of four eyes, interlocked in fascinating gestures that even a man-woman couple cannot craft. Slowly the partner released the newspaper reader?s hand and went towards the toilet, making a wonderful body movement like a woman. The man making eyes followed him. When his partner returned talking animatedly with the other guy, the newspaper reader looked annoyed, put down his paper. But tantalisingly ignoring him, his partner continued to chat away with the other guy, but took stealthy sideways glances at the newspaper reader. In one such look their eyes suddenly got locked and stayed hooked for a while. Then the partner hissed the word, ?Jealous!? to the newspaper reader. Theatrically the newspaper reader threw his paper and stormed angrily out of the cafe in high speed. Immediately transforming, the partner ran behind him in utter despair, calling out in a shrill voice, ?Pierre! Pierre! Je taime mon amour?? (Pierre, I love you?)
The Paris gay circuit may not be as effusive today, but gay men hate hypocrites and are extremely sensitive. My creative route led me to many genuine friendships. From them I?ve discovered intra gender nuances of the ?active gay? with the male role and ?passive? the woman?s role. Normally the roles don?t change, but there?s total democracy to switch on the couple?s choice. Among my gay women friends in Europe, many had hetero-sexual marriages that broke because they were frustrated over men?s attempts to dominate them. They subsequently became gay, and explain how lesbianism is very different. According to them, both women are at the same level, with a comfortable, acceptable hint of dominance and submission. Their emotional and sexual pleasures are different from men so their harmony is a win-win game. They?ll never return to the man-woman liaison.
In today?s democratic world we still find opponents of homosexuality getting incensed when two men or two women kiss before a marriage judge. However, let?s hope that Barack Obama?s support of gay rights signals a positive change of wind across different cultures and countries.
Shombit Sengupta is an international Creative Business Strategy consultant to top management. Reach him at http://www.shiningconsulting.com
