Becoming a parent changes the way you wake up, the way you think about the future, and even the way you see yourself. It’s a total transformation where your own needs suddenly come second. As Alia Bhatt puts it, speaking about her three-and-a-half-year-old daughter, Raha, ‘she’s the joy of my life.’ But that joy comes with a heavy weight. It is a journey that makes you grow up faster than anything else, forcing you to balance your own life with the mystery of a new one.
Alia Bhatt’s new chapter as a mom
For Alia Bhatt, life used to be all about movie sets and scripts, but motherhood has shifted her entire world. Despite her success, she faces the same emotional hurdles as any other parent. She describes the experience as a confusing mix of emotions, telling her father that motherhood is ‘a combination of joy and worry.’
This new role has made her more grounded, but it has also brought up constant questions. Like many of us, she finds herself wondering, “Am I being a good mother, am I being a good enough mother, am I saying the right things?”
The feeling every parent knows
In a recent conversation with spiritual leader Sadhguru at Jain International Trade Organisation (JITO) Chennai Plus, a program titled In Conversation With The Mystic had Alia Bhatt and spiritual leader Sadhguru talk about parenting.
Alia shared a sentiment that resonates with millions of parents worldwide. She confessed, “I’m so worried at all times,” explaining that children “learn life through you, at least for the first couple of years.”
This feeling of ‘parental guilt’ is something almost every parent feels. We want our kids to have the best start, so we put incredible pressure on ourselves to be perfect. Alia asked the question we all have in our hearts: “What would your one advice to a parent who is worried if they’re being a good parent be?”
‘A worried parent is not a good parent’: Sadhguru
Sadhguru’s response was a wake-up call for all the parents. He told her bluntly, “A worried parent is not a good parent.” He explained that our minds are often cluttered with our own ‘stuff,’ and when we worry, we stop seeing reality. He explained that “each one has their own world in their head and they will clash at some point.”
Instead of projecting our fears onto our kids, he suggested we clear our vision. As he put it, “Eyes are given to us not to see something, to see what’s there.” When we stop worrying, we can finally see our children for who they truly are.
Who is actually the ‘expert’ on life?
The most beautiful part of their talk was about who is actually the ‘expert’ on life. Sadhguru pointed out that between a parent and a child, the child is usually the one ‘bursting with joy.’ He gave Alia a radical piece of advice: “Drop this idea that you have to teach something.” Since children are far closer to life than adults, the roles should be reversed.
He told Alia, “You don’t give her any advice, you take from her.” Instead of trying to mould our kids into versions of ourselves, we should learn from their natural happiness. In the end, parenting isn’t about teaching them how to be like us; it’s about us remembering how to be like them.
Disclaimer: This article is for information purpose only. If you or someone you know is in distress or struggling with mental health, please seek help immediately.