A Pakistani humorist has given proof of the country’s subtle sense of humour and ability to poke fun at problems confronting the people by presenting a brand new version of a caste system.
The working class ‘Peoplius Commonus’ and the middle class ‘Middle Classus Dreamus’ slog it out, while the superior sects ‘Moulvius Venomous’ and ‘Militirus Industrius Land Lordius Supremus’ run the show.
“Under this system, society has been organised under a system of unorganised chaos… Any group who dares to move outside their circle is dealt with harshly,” read a write-up by humorist Mohammed Ayaz Abdal on a popular blog.
Abdal described the working class as “the ants”, who work for the “pleasure and honour of the superior classes”.
“All laws are basically made to control this class which is the largest is numbers,” he added.
Another psychological tactic being used is called ‘Democracy’ where they are provided a profound dream that they are responsible for electing their rulers, which are always from the higher classes.
The working class worships a circular God called “rotius” (roti/chapatis) and in the past, efforts have been made to introduce two more sub deities, “kapraos” (kapra/cloth) and “makanillium” (makan/home).
On the middle class, Abdal wrote, “This caste…dreams to be the super caste…Our one of the major exports to the outside world. They earn foreign exchange and good name for the country. Favourites hobbies are writing useless blogs, poetry, earning degrees and being anchor persons…”
The third caste, and the second-most important in the Pakistani social structure, is called “Moulvius Venomous”.
“This caste has the unique ability to accept any member of the other castes in its ranks. It is debatable whether they worship anybody. There has been some research that they worship only themselves, however, more research needs to be done,” the write-up on the Moulvis stated.
Topping the caste hierarchy is “Militirus Industrius Land Lordius Supremus”, which has been described as the “finest caste”.
“This is the final culmination of three superior castes. Evolution to its finest…In the beginning it was Land Lordius (feudals) who rightfully understood the rise of the Militirus (military) and Industrius (industrialists) caste and joined forces with them.
“The super caste (is)…more interested in increasing the profitability of foreign financial and arms manufacturing institutions, thereby, providing a valuable service to the world economic growth…They are responsible for industries such as defence housing societies, golf courses and, of course, textile mills,” Abdal wrote.
Abdal’s readers have responded with their suggestions.
One reader has suggested that “Bogus Mediacircus” should also be included as a caste in the Pakistan social structure.
“This caste is by itself. (It is)…further divided into two groups, Bogus Mediacircus Incompetentium and Bogus Mediacircus Hotairum. Both groups have shared ailment of Gossipitius. They take pride in appearing to be connected, informed and educated…” wrote the reader.