Dear Foreign Housekeeper/ Babysitter in New York:
I am writing to give you some good news. I am the president of Do-gooders Foundation in New York City. We are affiliated to the Sanctimonious Eastern Seaboard Bleeding Hearts Foundation. We can help you get Green Cards and stay in the US indefinitely. We can also help you get members of your family over to the US.
Despite the warnings of some of our earlier leaders like President Reagan, we have managed to put in place laws setting minimum wages at an extremely high level. This has of course, resulted in a large number of young people in our country not getting jobs at all. Most of these young people are African Americans and Hispanics. But this is not the time and place to talk about the deleterious effects of a high minimum wage law on our own youth.
What is of relevance to you is that though you may be getting much higher wages than you would have in your home country, though you may in fact be saving handsomely as compared to your earlier state, though you may have voluntarily taken up employment at wage levels that are attractive to you, the fact of the matter is that those attractive levels are lower than our generous statutory minimum wages. You can leverage this situation to your advantage provided you let us guide you.
You must come with us to our “friendly” law enforcement official. This friendly official has political ambitions. He/ she wants to initiate high-profile cases against prominent persons (for example, IMF head, consular officer) and obtain convenient publicity by handcuffing such persons on airplanes or outside schools, by subjecting them to the same treatment that is meted out to potentially violent, absconding criminals and by then claiming that all are equal before the law. Quite definitely in the area of handcuffing all seem to be equal in New York, the citadel of Left Liberalism.
You may wish to make the point that you have been overworked and ill-treated. Frankly, this is not of interest to us. Our organisation and the friendly